Don’t ask me how, but in recent weeks lazy me, with no job experience under my nearly twenty-three year old belt, managed to pull a job at Barnes and Noble. Now, call me weird but for a kid like me, that’s a dream job. I’ve known since around year eighteen that I’d be happy working in one of four places: Gamestop, Barnes and Noble, PetSmart or Petco.
Who landed a job at probably the most popular bookstore in America? Oh yea, me! Seriously, what world is this and how did I get here? And am I openly displaying my lack of self-confidence? Something must to be up.
But enough about that. I don’t plan to spend an entire fifty-millionth “first post” talking about my fresh, new job -however awesome it may be- or the fact that I’m horribly self-conscious about everything that encompasses “Me”. I just want to book talk.
I want to talk about how, for the last three months I haven’t been able to write or plot for a grain of rice but ever since work, and getting out the house, it’s like my motivation is coming right back. I knew it loved me. It just couldn’t handle me laying in bed marathoning Supernatural and Korean RomComs five days a week.
Seriously, what has my life been!?
I’d like to say, though, formally (or informally since I have no one to truly be formal to) that although I had about four idea bunnies hopping around my empty-field of a brain, I’ve kindly asked two of them to leave and combined my options into two main titles and a tentative third. If you’ve ever seen any of the dozens of posts that I frequently delete you’ll know Lostborn, as usual, but I’ve never once mentioned The Mark of Hadros which is a funny little idea about a bond of loyalty that spans across generations and brings together a somewhat reluctant crew of characters that truly have the power to change the world.
My head is always swimming with fantasy. I often wish so badly that things could be what I know they probably never can. Like wolves that can morph into humans, or anthropomorphic Lions that specialize in intergalactic trade. Like, WHAT!?
I just want it out in the open, here and now. My life, for once in what feels like a long time, finally feels like it’s moving on track. A few months ago I met someone and her mother came to our group and said in regards to my sabbatical, “it doesn’t matter how long it takes, what matters is that you stick with it. And that goes for everything you do in life.”
I don’t know why but that was the first time those words stuck with me. Words that I’ve probably said to a dozen people before, but never actually lived by myself. And I realized that I gave up on a lot of things growing up. So, then and there, I decided that, no matter how many times I may think to give up on these books, I won’t. And, in the three years that I’ve been plotting and writing and erasing and typing, I haven’t.
This, right here, not jobless, barely motivated, book-hoarding, plot-hopping, lazy-boned me. This is Me Beginning A Dream.
And I’m excited.